Are you ready for summer? Not sure? Then take this helpful quiz, grab
yourself a roll of duct tape and some heavy plastic, and bring on the heat!
yourself a roll of duct tape and some heavy plastic, and bring on the heat!
The Blonde on the Beach by JP Lundstrom
 |
 |
It
was a time of joyous celebration. He was
sixteen years old, and it was almost summertime. His fairly new driver’s license fit snugly
into the billfold that swelled his right back pocket. The family’s secondary, no, tertiary car,
stationed in the seafront parking lot, had been his to drive whenever he wished
for four months now. The molten sunlight
poured down on automobiles and people alike, and temperatures were rising.
1.
The day would have been perfect, except
a) He needed a diversion.
b) There were no girls he knew on the
beach.
c) He felt too lazy for volleyball.
d) All of the above.
2.
He decided to work on his tan. Girls
love guys with a tan. Last summer Kelly
Brockman couldn’t keep her hands off him.
a) He pulled his cap over his face.
b) He crossed his arms behind his head.
c) He closed his eyes.
d) All of the above.
3.
Lying in the sand, you can feel the vibration when someone is getting
close. Grains of sand kick up and make a
swish! swish! then land with a barely discernible rattle. He felt someone approaching, lifted his cap
to see who it was. She had beach-blonde
hair, streaked by the sun.
a) She was tall and tan, with slender,
firm legs.
b) She was about 28 or 29 years old.
c) She was not bad, for an older woman.
d) All of the above.
4. Her dark glasses covered her face. She almost walked by him, but then she
stopped, lifted her sunglasses and smiled at him. She was beautiful. She had a question.
“Can I borrow one of your cigarettes?”
a) He stammered when he tried to answer.
b) He spilled most of his cigarettes in
the sand.
c) He felt the most primal of urges.
d) All of the above.
5.
She sat down on the sand beside him.
They talked. He told her he was
seventeen, that he would be a senior come fall.
She told him that she had a beach house nearby. She said her husband had left her there while
he tended to business as usual in the city.
“Business as usual” meant his current girlfriend.
a) She traced the outline of his lips with
her finger.
b) She said he had a beautiful mouth.
c) She asked him to kiss her.
d) All of the above.
6.
She leaned into his kisses. She kissed
as if he were the most important thing in her life.
a) Her hands explored his body.
b) She pushed him back down into the sand.
c) She did things with her tongue he had
never even thought of.
d) All of the above.
7.
When they tired of kissing, she held his hand and they walked on the
beach. She asked him if he’d like to see
her beach house. He knew what she meant
by that.
a) He said yes.
b) He tried not to act too nervous.
c) He tried not to act too excited.
d) All of the above.
8.
When they got to the beach house, a lady was waiting in the kitchen. A housekeeper. Lou Ella, the blonde called her. The blonde told her to come back tomorrow.
The house keeper looked him over and raised an eyebrow.
a) He got embarrassed.
b) His face got hot.
c) He got sweaty.
d) All of the above.
9.
The blonde led him into the bathroom. She
turned on the shower and water fell from the ceiling. They stood in the falling water and
kissed. Then she took him into the
bedroom.
a) They kissed some more.
b) They fucked.
c) They fucked some more.
d) All of the above.
10.
She said they could play a game, where he was a serial rapist and she was his
intended victim. She said the rougher he
treated her, the more exciting the sex would be.
a) He believed her.
b) He hit her.
c) He choked her.
d) All of the above.
11.
A door slammed. A voice called,
“Honey! I’m home!” He heard someone sprinting up the
stairs. As the blonde’s husband appeared
in the doorway,
a) He jumped out of the bed.
b) He grabbed his shorts.
c) He was still naked.
d) All of the above.
12.
The blonde started laughing. The husband
laughed, too, and said, “Get lost, kid.
You’ve had your fun for the day.”
The blonde said, “Did you see his face?”
a) He was embarrassed.
b) He was scared.
c) He was mad.
d) All of the above.
13.
That night he couldn’t sleep. He went
for a drive in his family’s tertiary car and wound up at the beach. He got out and just walked.
a) He didn’t see anything.
b) He didn’t hear anything.
c) He didn’t know anything happened.
d) All of the above.
14.
In the morning, a man and woman out for their usual walk on the beach spotted
something. It lay at the edge of the
water, rocking back and forth with the waves.
It was the body of a woman.
a) She was blonde.
b) She had been tall, with slender, firm
legs.
c) She was about 28 or 29 years old.
d) All of the above.
15.
It was the blonde. The housekeeper told
the police about the young visitor she’d had.
When the police showed her some pictures from the high school yearbook,
they had their man.
a) He was young.
b) He was stupid.
c) He was caught.
d) All of the above.
16.
It was a speedy trial. The prosecutor
painted the picture of an innocent young housewife attacked, raped, and
strangled by a sex-crazed, teenage psychopath.
The jury bought it hook, line, and sinker.
a) He would never be a senior.
b) He would never be a junior.
c) He would always be a jailbird.
d) All of the above.
17.
It was too much. He had to get out. He woke up.
a) He was in class.
b) He’d been dreaming.
c) He’d slept through the final.
d) All of the above.
18. He sighed, glad to get that blonde
out of his brain. But he couldn’t. She sat in front of him, grading test papers.
She asked him:
“Do you need more time?”
a) He said no.
He handed in a blank paper.
b) He got out of there, fast.
c) All of the above.
19.
He got in his family’s tertiary car and waited for his hands to stop
shaking. Kelly Brockman waved to him as
he drove out of the parking lot, but he didn’t stop. He needed air. He headed for the beach.
a) He pulled his cap over his face.
b) He lay back and crossed his arms behind
his head.
c) He closed his eyes.
d) All of the above.
20.
He felt someone approaching. Grains of
sand kicked up and made a swish! swish! landing with a barely discernible
rattle. He lifted his cap. She had red hair, streaked by the sun.
a) She was tall and freckled, with
slender, firm legs.
b) She was about 26 or 27 years old.
c) She was not bad, for an older woman.
d) All of the above.
