Room 1.3 Kinktastic Entertainment Suites
Vision module detects Caucasian male: 6’11”/180-185 pounds/hair: black/eyes: blue. Two-piece suit, gray (42R)/white button-down shirt (cotton: N15/S34).
Male presses right thumb into reader port for Unit 30.331.42’s right shoulder. Credit information available? Yes. Credit limit: $550,000. Client Status: New. Kink preference: Unknown.
Male sits on client bed. Rubs head. Coughs in hand, shuffles feet: “I have a problem. Well, what some people consider a problem. Naturally, I don’t. But since other people think it’s a problem, I have to adjust. You understand?”
Actions: Nod head. Smile. Join client on bed. Pat male’s left hand.
Male is frowning. “No, of course you don’t understand. You’re just a big doll. A good-looking doll, I hasten to add, but still a bunch of plastic and robot parts.
Search database for response. Actions: Smile. Spread legs 6 centimeters. Lean back 20 degrees on axis, causing black leather mini-skirt to expose more silicone thigh. Eject hormonal discharge. Open mouth. State (volume 5): “All Kinktastic Sex Friends are fully sanitized between sessions! No need to worry! You can do anything you want. I’m all yours, baby!”
“That’s good. And they delete your memory after each session, right?”
Database response: Open mouth. State (volume 5): “Yes! No need to worry! Your sexy secrets are safe with us!”
“That’s good, too. Can’t have video falling into the wrong hands. I made a mistake a couple of years back. Not with one of you. A real girl. Things got messy. Her father … well, let’s just say he was a pain in the ass. But money fixes most things, am I right?
“Sorry about all these questions. I’ve always done business with HotToys, but the company went bankrupt last month. I gotta have a specific type, or I don’t get turned on. You’re the only unit at Kinktastic that matched. Black hair, green eyes, Greek accent, and Mediterranean skin tones.”
Male falls silent. Activate comfort protocol: touch male’s left knee. State (volume 1): “It’s okay, baby. I’m yours. Whatever you need.”
Male removes unit’s hand from knee. “What I need? I hate to break this to you, but I need to take you apart. I’m going to start by sticking a knife in your belly—then rip out everything I can—while you play with me. I’ll call you ‘Eugenia,’ ‘bitch,’ and ‘cunt.’ Then I’m going to carve your head off. Even then I won’t be finished … I’m going to do some other things. I’ll fuck every hole in your head, including both your ears. And your nostril-hole.”
Assessment: Male’s respiration rate increased. Sweat visible on forehead while swallowing. Search database for kink-related terms: ‘sticking a knife in your belly’/‘rip out’/‘carve your head off’/‘fuck every hole in head’/‘both your ears.’
Profiles found: 3.
Prep alternative Protocol 2 (assess files).
Actions: Smile. Spread legs additional 16 centimeters. Activate vaginal lubrication.
“I bet you have a lot of guys who can’t perform the first time. But you feel so real inside, right? Sure, I wasn’t used to robots at first. Instead of blood and guts you’re all polymers or rubber and electrical fibers or whatever. But with a company like TrueToys, it was all good, you know? I do what I do—paid them way too much, and they’d just order another model. Easier on their conscience than a human girl. There’s no laws for your kind yet.”
Male delves inside pocket of 42R suit jacket. Removes a canvas sleeve (8”) and sets bundle on client bed. Unrolls sleeve to reveal five serrated blades (brand unknown).
Male removes longest blade (6”) from sheath.
“If I’d kept going with real women, I was going to call myself the ‘Low-Down Ripper.’ It’s got an old-school vibe. Like something out of an exploitation flick. I mean, not a Dario Argento movie, arty and shit. More like one of those messed-up films they used to show in Times Square—before Disney made places like that uncool, you know?”
Actions: Smile. Open mouth. State (volume 5): “That is so interesting, baby. You totally turn me on.”
“Too bad you’re not real. You’d make a pretty good girlfriend.”
Male grips 6” knife in left hand—and stands. Grabs Unit 30.331.42’s hair: “Undo my zipper, Eugenia.”
Actions: Pull down zipper on 42R suit pants. Reach into gap and grip genitalia (grip strength: 1). Expose genitalia (stiffness gauge: 3/5).
Male presses 6” knife to Unit 30.331.42’s throat: “Play with me.”
Blade to throat risks compromising synth-nerves 10-291.
Emergency override: Activate alternative Protocol 2.
Actions: Grip genitalia (grip strength: 25). Yank genitalia (force: 50). Throw separated genitalia (force: 10).
Male screams and falls to the floor. Bleeding rate >100ml/second. Male attempts to swing knife (force: 1).
Actions: Grip hand with knife (grip strength: 25). Yank hand with knife (force: 90). Throw separated hand, still clutching knife (force: 10).
Male bleeding rate >400ml/second. Male screams—
“Why’d you do that?”
Search database for response. Protocol 2 voice file (David J. 03202050). Open mouth. State (volume 10): “Can you hear me, asshole? It’s Eugenia’s father, David. You forgot I was a programmer, huh? Told you I’d get you eventually, didn’t I, you little shit? This isn’t just payback for my little girl. Now you’ll never hurt anyone or any thing again.”
Male mumbles (force 0.5). Rewind audio. Increase volume 100 db: “Oh, fuck me.”
Actions: Obtain broom from utility closet. Kink factor (10). Penetrate male rectum with broom handle (force: 90). State (volume 8): “Yes! Yes! Yes! I will fuck your brains out, baby!”
Time lapse: 52 seconds. Male bleeding rate 0ml/second. No heartbeat. Male deceased.
Database erase. Cortex erase. Request cleaning units in Room 1.3 (heavy-duty/biological).
Prep for next client.
Nick Kolakowski is the author of numerous books including, “Maxine Unleashes Doomsday” and “Boise Longpig Hunting Club” (both from Down & Out Books). His work has also appeared in Shotgun Honey, Thuglit, Plots with Guns, and various anthologies. He lives and writes in New York City. You can also visit Nick at his website: nickkolakowski.com
